Thursday, February 19, 2009

It's Been A Long Time....I Shouldn't Have Left You...

Happy March, folks! Good to see you back!

Let me apologize for not updating as I should, but there's a little thing called life that also takes place outside of the confines of blogger.com in which I engage from time to time....

So...moving on:

March is here. You know, I've always equated March with a certain level of ridiculousness. I actually think a number of people do. Like - which other month is described as a schizophrenic cliche? In like a lion, out like a lamb? It's EXPECTED that there will be a blizzard or some other wintry anomaly at the beginning of the month followed by a 75-degree March 31st, which leaves us all with "walkin' na-MOAN-ya" by April 5th.

Or what about St. Patrick's Day? There's a high level of ridiculousness in its celebration, isn't there? Green beer?? GREEN BEER??? Paired with a mushy stew of cabbage, corned beef and potatoes, there've got to be ridiculously copious amounts of chunks being blown every March 17th!

How about the ridiculousness of a lack of a three-day weekend during one of the longest months of the year? Especially when we're just coming off six months of GOOD federally mandated three day+ weekends! September has Labor day. October allows the celebration of the anihilation of ethic groups native to the Americas. November is Thanksgiving (see October). December begets "the BIG THREE" - Chrismahanakwanzaakah. January has Martin Luffah da Kang Day. February has President's Day. March has.....anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

And what about The Ides of March? That was pretty ridiculous, huh? I mean good ole Caesar got offed on 3/15 by his boyz from the hood. And I know I wasn't the only one who thought Caesar was dumb as a doorknob for not heeding the creepy oracle (on the scratchy Julius Caesar play album) when it said, "beeeewwwwwaaaaarrrrrre the iiiiiiiiiiiiidessssss uv MAAAAAHHHHHHCCCCCHHHHHH!" Please believe, if somone told me "doooonnnnnn't go ooooowwwwwtttt ahhhhhnnnnnn theeeee fifffffff-tteeeeennnnnttttthhhhhh", I'd have my behind up under some covers @ 5523!!!

So to bring today's theme of ridiculousness full circle, I thought I'd share with you a recent quote I read from The King of RE-DICK-YOU-LESS-NESS - Mr. Kanye West.

Now I know that at this point, one of my followers has probably abandonned ship after reading the above line. Just remember, girl, you can pick your blogs, but you can't pick your family :-)!!!

But ole Yeezy has done it yet AGAIN!!! Is it the food?? I swear, I wanna know what he EATS every morning. Like is his water enriched with egoflavinoids? What's in his Wheaties? What could possibly make him think that it's okay to utter these lines:

There's nothing more to be said about music. I'm the f**king end-all, be-all of music. …Oh my God, I'm one of the greatest rappers in the world. I'll get on a track and completely ee-nihilate that track, I'll eat it and rip it in half. I wouldn't have to think of it. …I have, like, nuclear power, like a superhero, like Cyclops when he puts his glasses on."
You notice I put that crap in soft pink itallics, since that's pretty much what I think of Kanye. Dude is soft and pink and creamy in the center! He couldn't make sense if he had all the ingredients and the recipe to put it together!!
End-all, be-all of music?? Werrrdd? So there was nothing before Kanye and clearly nothing after? So when we look up Kanye in the dictionary, we should see this: http://www.isber.ucsb.edu/~blewalker/gye_nyame.GIF??
Oh, but wait....one of the greatest rappers in the WORLD?? Oh REALLY doe Kanye?? REALLY DOE?? So you're in the same league as this guy: http://www.janettebeckman.com/jb.rocks/hiphop/assets/krs1.jpg
Kanye, I'm giving you the seriously squinty-eyed, lip curled to the side stare right now. I really am! For equating yourself to a Chernobyl reactor you deserve:
and that "W" is not for your last name.
IDIOT.

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